Tag Archive for: romance

Are You Loveable? 4 Tips to Help You Feel Loveable – Part 2

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heart candlesSee my previous blog

Here are some Relationship Indicators to let you know if you don’t feel loveable or deep down really don’t believe you deserve to be loved.

  1. Do you need to be in charge? Do you make all the arrangements? Do you ask for input from your partner? Or better still, do you dismiss the input from your partner?

Tip #2

It’s all about love isn’t it? What does loving behavior look like to you? How is love communicated? How does it feel?

The questions above describe someone with a ‘controlling’ personality or at least a strong ‘controlling’ characteristic. Someone who has to know it all, have all the answers, tells others what to do without asking or getting input. You have met that type of person before, right? You may have even been married to one? If you are perfectly honest, you have had some of those behaviors yourself too. Some of the time it is normal:  most of us have a little of that.

However, when it is overpowering, it is out of balance and a less than ideal way of treating another person. It’s disrespectful and inconsiderate. Why do some people behave that way? The short answer is they don’t love themselves very much. They are insecure and full of self-doubt. The controlling behavior is a mask to feel ‘strong’ because inside he/she does not feel that way at all.

Here are few tips to help change this behavior if you have these. Start by being kind to yourself. What is it that you don’t like about yourself? You might ask ‘How do I know what that is?’ Here’s an example. You might know someone that drives you crazy. What is it about that person that drives you crazy? That trait is something you have within yourself that you don’t like about you. Here’s the good news — you can change it!

Maybe your friend doesn’t listen and talks over people. This drives you crazy. Pay attention- do you do that to people? The answer is probably yes, or you do something similar. If you don’t like being treated that way, then don’t treat someone else that way. Make a new choice — this will require some positive self-talk “I am going to be patient when listening to others.” “I am going to slow down and be present, I am interested in what this person is sharing with me.” “I intend to listen with an open mind and not be judgmental or critical.” This is how you create change for the better and how you can change the things that you don’t like about yourself. Make new choices about how you want to feel in your life. Treat yourself better as well as the people around you.

Ask questions in a relationship, have dialogue, and ask for input. Asking questions and communicating is not a weakness:  its called consideration. When you treat yourself in a loving way, you will treat others in a loving way and will be treated that way in return. Love isn’t about control, it’s about sharing. And isn’t that what you seek, sharing and intimacy on all levels?

 

Regina Sisco is a certified Life & Relationship Coach. She is an expert with helping people transform their relationship suffering into self-acceptance and relationship bliss. Sign-up for my Free Gift! The Magic Touch – 5 Secrets To Successful Dating Tips.

 

Are You Loveable? 4 Tips to Help You Feel Loveable

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Here are some Relationship Indicators to let you know if you don’t feel loveable or deep down really don’t believe you deserve to be loved.

1. Do you give your poweholding handsr away in relationships? Do you let the other person make most of the decisions? Do you trust your own decisions?
2. Do you need to be in charge? Do you make all the arrangements? Do you ask for input from your partner? Or better still, do you dismiss the input from your partner?
3. When you feel the relationship is getting hard and communication is difficult for you, do you sabatoge the relationship (have bad behavior like saying or doing something cruel) so the other person will end it?
4. Do you feel insecure or needy when it comes to relationship? Do you hear yourself saying “I need someone to love me.” Or “Why am I still alone.”

During this month of Love in February I will be giving weekly tips to answer these four Relationship Indicators. Share your stories with me and I will provide advice directly to you on my blog.

Regina Sisco is a certified Life & Relationship Coach. She is an expert with helping people transform their relationship suffering into self-acceptance and relationship bliss. Regina can be reached at [email protected].

 

Being in the Presence of Love?

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I_love_all_that_I_am copyDo you know what being in the presence of love feels like? It feels like honor, trust and surety. You are with a person you can rely on, someone who supports you no matter what is happening. Your partner doesn’t always have to agree with you, or even fully understand your position on something but knowing he/she is always there for you is the presence of love.

It’s a gift knowing you can have someone who shines their light for you and you for them. No one has to be right or wrong, it can be just what is – an experience in this moment in time when you or your partner are growing or releasing some old pattern that is no longer useful.

Being in the presence of love is holding the space of love for your partner and yourself – which may be a bit more challenging. The presence and space of love is no judgment or guilt or doubt. It is a space where all things are possible. Imagine what this feels like — a safe space for love.

Regina Sisco is a Relationship Coach and Divine Matchmaker™ who enjoys helping others to release fear and bring more love into their lives. Her website is www.reginasisco.com and her email is [email protected].

 

©All Rights Reserved 2014

 

 

 

 

 

 

Is Tenderness The Same As Intimacy?

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love kissDo you know how to express tenderness in a relationship? Is tenderness the same as intimacy? Let’s say they go hand in hand. It’s letting yourself feel vulnerable and connected to your partner and with yourself. I know many women and men who do not like to feel vulnerable. It’s not safe, they feel too open and in the past when they have cared that much they were hurt and the wound was deep.

Does that mean you will never let yourself be vulnerable again or allow yourself to share an intimate tender moment with a partner? I certainly hope not because you are cutting yourself off from love – from giving and receiving love. You wouldn’t want to miss that tender touch, that brush of his or her lips across your neck, the melting of stress and the “yes” to love would you?

I hope your response is of course not! Life is to short not to experience the joys, the tenderness and the surprises of love. Saying yes to love takes courage and a commitment to your personal happiness.

Regina Sisco is a Relationship Coach and Divine Matchmaker™ who enjoys helping others to release fear and bring more love into their lives. Her website is www.reginasisco.com and her email is [email protected].

©All Rights Reserved 2014

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Are You Ready To Date?

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After a major break-up or divorce it takes time to heal and regain your equilibrium.  Many of my clients tell me that they want to be in a relationship again or be married again soon after the relationship has ended.  That’s a pleasant idea for down the road… but not too soon.

It’s important to give yourself time to heal and give yourself some perspective on what really happened.  He left you, you left him, and life goes on right? Yes it certainly does but what about the quality of your life?  What about the quality of your future relationship(s)?  That should matter to you.  We all know women and men who seem to hop from one relationship to the next without giving themselves time to assess—to really look at what worked and what didn’t work in the relationship.

We all have behavior patterns that are healthy and some that are not healthy at all, especially when it comes to relationships. Here are a few questions to reflect on:

–         Do you date the same type of person over and over?

–         How do you expect to be treated?

–         What do you want out of the relationship?

If you are ready for a committed relationship these things are important to consider.  What do you really want out of a relationship? Fun? Sex? Companionship?  Do you want commitment, intimacy, mutual support, respect and deep love?  If you do you have now just crossed over the line into work and commitment in the relationship to have that true divine union, trust, love, intimacy, and joy. It takes work, you have to know yourself and what you truly want in a relationship. It takes a mutual exchange and a mutual level of commitment – that give and take to support each other in your own individual growth and then as a couple.

The “knowing who you are and what you want” is critical. Women can sometimes loose themselves in the relationship and in their partner and no longer know who they are.  Before dating, be prepared– really to do your homework. There is nothing more important than your personal happiness!

 

Regina Sisco is a Relationship Wellness Expert and national internet Radio Show Host of Shining Bright on VoiceAmerica.com. For more information go to www.lifestreamholisticcoaching.com

Self-Respect

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I have a client who wasn’t allowing herself to be treated respectfully in a relationship.  She thought she wasn’t good enough to have a man treat her well.  Since she didn’t value or respect herself, she sought men who treated her the same.  She became aware of her choices that she allowed men in, who in her words were “barely adequate.”  She realized that she viewed herself the same way and knew she had some inner work to do.

Why did she value herself so poorly?  She realized that the childhood abuse created many beliefs and programs that she wasn’t good enough or didn’t deserve much, and that’s how she began living her life. She didn’t deserve much, her own personal worth and value was low.  How did she begin to create the shift for herself?  She started letting go of the past by forgiving those in childhood and perhaps the tougher road of forgiving herself.

Then, I shared some techniques with her to help her release this old program of not valuing herself and to restore her self-esteem and self-respect.  She is fully aware now that her choices matter and that she matters.  When she settled based on past experiences she didn’t receive much.  Now as she is becoming more aware that she is not willing to settle with herself or in a relationship. She understands that she has more work to do.

She has a higher level of self-worth and wants to attract a better quality of life and men.  She respects herself more and sees that she is the driver and creator of her life. She is regaining her power and can now see the path before her.  She is reconnecting to her true self and beginning to allow self love in.

And take a deep breath- breathe that in-

Affirmations:  affirmations are positive statements to read and say outlook to help you maintain a positive outlook.

I know what it feels like to respect myself.  I am opening the door to self-love.

 

Regina Sisco is a Relationship Wellness Expert and national internet Radio Show Host of Shining Bright on VoiceAmerica.com. For more information go to www.lifestreamholisticcoaching.com

Laughter, Fun and Play

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ImageI hope you are enjoying your summer!  Do you remember being a kid and how summers seemed to last forever?  Now as an adult they certainly seem to be zooming by!  I wanted to remind you how good laughter is for us, and sometimes how we might forget to laugh.  I find it amusing when I can laugh at myself for the some of the crazy things I decide to do like listening to my self-critic!  That’s always a good indicator to me, when my self-critic is talking loud, to step back and laugh with myself.  As adults we can all take “things” so seriously, it’s that reminder to have fun and play especially now in the summer.  Even when I’m not really sure what all those “things” are!

I love going for a hike and walking by water, it’s so refreshing and cleansing.  Breathing in fresh air, sitting by the water and enjoying nature.  This is one of my favorite things to do it’s relaxing, revitalizing and fun all in one visit.

It’s important to take time for self-rejuvenation, and being out in nature is one of the best ways to do that.  Do something fun this weekend and enjoy the laughter!

Regina Sisco is a Relationship Wellness Expert and national internet Radio Show Host of Shining Bright on VoiceAmerica.com. For more information go to www.lifestreamholisticcoaching.com